Q: I’ve never gone on a date before but asked a girl out. Where do you think I should take her?

A: This is a great question and I realize how nerve-racking it can be to go on a date for the first time. First, while choosing an appropriate date spot, it is important to remember if this person likes you, they will just be happy to spend time with you regardless of where you go. However, try to go someplace that engages their interests. For example, if you are dating someone who enjoys art, you could have a nice afternoon at an art museum together. If you cannot find something like that, you could always go out for a nice dinner together someplace you have been and know provides a quality romantic dining experience. If you want to be more memorable or creative, in my personal experience, women like monster trucks, so you could take her someplace monster truck-related. I hope this helps and good luck on your first date.

Q: I’m worried about the upcoming holiday season. My family makes the whole thing super stressful. What do I do?

A: This is something I have found myself also dealing with, so I sympathize with you completely. This time of year carries an expectation of parties and gift giving that can be incredibly overwhelming. My best advice would be to ask your family if you can take a lesser role in all the festivities. I know this may seem hard to do without sounding like a grinch, but I assure you if you really are not into it, it is better to seem that way and spare yourself the turmoil. I would also recommend you try to enjoy some smaller moments with closer family and friends. This may help you to slow down and gain some more enjoyment out of holiday times.

Q: Dear Thomas, I am gay and have trouble telling new people I meet. How do I make this easier for myself?

A: Thanks for this question. I am nonbinary and have had similar experiences, so I feel somewhat qualified to answer this. First off, I am glad you feel comfortable starting to tell people you meet about your identity, but you do not necessarily have to if you are having trouble. I will usually tell new acquaintances my pronouns, but you do not need to feel pressure to tell someone about your sexual identity. They should just be able to accept you as a person. If you do find yourself wanting to tell a new friend you are gay, you should be able to bring it up casually without it being a big deal. If someone is making you feel weird about it, you simply do not have to be friends with that person. In my personal experience, people have been good at trying to use my preferred pronouns and when they do not it is typically by accident. If you are worried about telling someone because they come off as a person who would disapprove, I would try anyway. Often people will surprise you with how tolerant they can be when it comes to their friends.

Q: Dear Thomas, I want to watch “The Vampire Diaries” with my girlfriend, but she won’t. She watched one episode with me and said it wasn’t her thing. What do I do?

A: Honestly, I think you should break up. I hate to be the one to tell you, but there are some people who you just can’t fix. To me, this sounds like a deal-breaker, and my best advice would be to break up and find someone who appreciates peak television. I hope this helps.

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